Am I forgiven?

It’s Monday Grace!

When Bob won the lottery he instantly became a millionaire. Not sure what he should do next, Bob just kept working at his job, living in his house, and driving his old car. Not only did he not look like a millionaire, he didn’t feel like a millionaire. It was only when he began to spend some of that money that Bob began to realize how his life had changed.

In a similar way, it is common for people to continue to feel unforgiven after they come to Jesus. The fact of their forgiveness is not really the question; it’s the feeling of forgiveness.

When Bob drove his old car, the driver’s window still stuck, and Bob still had to struggle to get it to work. The house still had a lot of things to fix. His job still had its challenges. Life was about the same—until Bob realized that he didn’t need to fight that old car window, or fix the problems with the house, or even continue to work at his difficult job. Once Bob understood the meaning of the change in his life, he left those problems behind.

When we come to Jesus and learn that His forgiveness has covered all our sins, we may not understand the practical application of that truth in our lives. We continue to live with regret and defeat. We think of ourselves as defined by our failures and compromises. The stupid decisions we made, the foolish things we did, fill us with regret that doesn’t go away simply by the knowledge of our forgiveness.

It isn’t until we begin to walk in that forgiveness, incorporate the freedom and the victory into our lives, that we find the real meaning of being forgiven. When I can think of those old acts and struggles as part of the past, no longer part of who I am, then I become free.

When Bob began to understand how much money he had now and believed that no one was able to take it away, he got rid of his old car and bought a new one. It wasn’t long before Bob decided to buy a new house. In his job, he had new confidence and new enthusiasm. In fact, he did so well at work that he didn’t want to quit. But he knew he could if he wanted.

When you and I begin to understand that we are fully and freely forgiven by the love of God in Jesus, we will begin to put off the old ways. Worry about the future will fade. We will start to feel valued and loved, perhaps more than ever before. Each time we decide to walk in our forgiveness, to stop calling ourselves names and downgrading ourselves, we will find more victory and freedom. Even the old sins will start to go away.

You see, Bob always thought of himself as a lower class man. He never made much money and had to put up with a lot of struggles. His picture of himself didn’t change when he won the lottery. It changed when he began to live like a man who won the lottery.

You and I were taught to think of ourselves as broken and addicted sinners. We told ourselves that we were stupid and that sin had power over us. When Christ saved us and washed our sins away, that feeling didn’t really change. It only changes when we begin to live like people who have been forgiven.

Forgiven people are brand new beings. The Scripture tells us that the old has been washed away, the old man has died. You are no longer that person who did those things. You are not what you were. Now you are washed and sanctified because Jesus loved you enough to pay the price. Sin no longer has dominion over you. The evil one cannot make you do anything. You can walk in victory and freedom. You can know that you will be just as forgiven tomorrow as you are today. And even if you sin again, you can never be defined by that sin.

And, in that final day when you and I stand before the Lord, there will be no recital of our sins, because they are gone. There will be no listing of the things we have done, either before or after we were saved, because all has been washed in the blood of Jesus. There is no room for fear in the love of Jesus for you.

So, yes, you are forgiven. Fully and freely. That’s what the whole story is about. God so loved the world that He sent Jesus to the cross to wash away our sins and set us free forever. That’s the truth. Begin to live as though it is true, and you will begin to feel that it is true.


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7 responses to “Am I forgiven?

  1. Praise God. Thank you, Pastor Dave!

  2. Amy

    How do you live in that forgiveness when your child hates you for staying in an abusive marriage? When that child blames you for things you did that you truly thought were the best? Like staying with an abusive husband because you were afraid to leave for fear the Lord would stop loving you? For fear he would take the kids because he threatened to?

    How can I ever live with happiness knowing my child feels I destroyed his life?


    • They don’t call it “Creative Memories” for nothing! I have eight grown sons, and I have found that their memories of our life together are often different from mine. They didn’t see what I saw or carry the burden I carried. Nor do they have the right to judge my decisions, even though they affected their lives. Part of our walk is the decisions our parents made. God uses that in piecing together the good He has for us. So, they now have to live what they have been given… just like the rest of us.

      You did not ruin your child’s life. Your abusive husband has far more responsibility for what happened. You had a very real struggle that your child does not yet understand. We pray that he/she never has to experience it firsthand. If your child’s life is free from the struggle and pain you suffered, they are fortunate. But you are not responsible for how your child handles that second-hand struggle now.

      The burden of another person’s unforgiveness is not easy to carry, but it is easier when you know that the Lord has forgiven you. There is nothing you can do to change what happened. If it was a mistake, you are sorry. If it was sinful on your part, you are sorry. Beyond that, you can’t go back to change what you did or did not do. Someday your child will see that. God has already put it far away.

      I pray that your child will grow up. No one can destroy another’s life. Damage it, yes. Take away opportunities or cause hardships, yes. But not destroy. The rest of life still belongs to your child. He/she will only mature when the decision is made to move forward.

      And, for you, it is time to give your child into the hands of the Lord. The love to overcome and find peace is there. You have no more responsibility for your child’s happiness, nor should their anger continue to dictate your feelings. It is also time for you to move on. Your child is making a choice to be bitter. You can’t fix that. Nor will he/she as long as the past is the focus. Lots of us have overcome difficult childhoods.

      I know this is blunt. You can live in the forgiveness of the Lord by telling yourself every day of His love and reminding yourself what Jesus was willing to do for you. His work was enough. His sacrifice means you no longer have to sacrifice. Trust Him.

  3. Amy

    I have tried twice to leave a reply, so hopefully the third time is a charm! LOL

    Thank you for your reply. Your words really were a healing balm to soul.
    Mine, like most abuse survivors, is a long story but the short of it is that I was married 20 years to a verbally, mentally, emotionally, spiritually and sexually abusive man and we have two sons who are now 28 and 25. My ex walked out on us in ’09 and it took me two years to divorce him. I am remarried to a man who has helped me find healing and love again.

    My oldest son and I had an amazing opportunity last year to come together when I took him to a clinic in Idaho for treatment for Lyme disease which he’s had most of his life. We stayed in an Airbnb for a total of 8 weeks and during that time God answered my prayer of over 10 years that my son would finally open up to me about the past. Well, he did, and it came with a vengeance, directing most of his anger, hate and hurt towards me. It felt like he ripped me open and I started falling down this rabbit hole which I’m just now finding my way out of.
    His accusations towards me were mostly that I didn’t leave and take him and his brother out of that house, that my choices became his by default as he said. That I had many opportunities to leave but just didn’t and I didn’t love him enough to take him out of there, etc etc etc.

    I was crushed to say the least and as often happens, God answered my prayer in a way I wasn’t expecting! LOL And then the guilt, doubts and regrets began weighing me down after all those years and the what if’s, shoulda, coulda, woulda all set in.

    When we came back from ID last summer, my husband and I offered my son a place to stay on our property so he could continue healing and get on his feet financially. And things between him and I seemed to be healing somewhat, but being around my son was still stifling to me and I often felt like I was walking on eggshells. Sadly, my son decided this past spring to tell my husband off over some stupid thing and my husband said it was time for him to move out because he knew that letting it go would only result in my son doing it again down the road. So my son has been gone for several months now, but is still in our area so we see each other on occasion.

    I did sign up for GHW Academy last August and have found the course to be very helpful in finding my way to healing from the past. Your video on false guilt was amazing!

    Anyway, probably just a jumbled thoughts that I’ve written into a book, but the other night when I left my first comment my heart was broken. I know I cannot change the past and that it’s time to let my son grow up and find his own way, so thank you for your blunt words that helped give me validation.

    • Amy

      I’m excited to share that my son came over the other night to talk with my husband and I. He finally apologized to my husband for how he talked to him several months ago and made somewhat of an apology to me too.

      It’s a start. God is working in his life and I’m moving on into my own life. I told my son that things from the past cannot be changed but I hoped we could move forward from here building a new relationship.

      • Batya Ahul

        Great news Amy😎, there will be many here praying for you. God is good always 🌈

      • Amy

        Thank you, Batya! That means a lot. I’m working hard to step into this new season of my life and let go of my sons, allowing them to find their own way and asking God to lead and watch of them. ❤
        Yes, God is good through it all. 🙂

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